Your beard engulfs your face, covers your eyes
It’s thick enough to protect you from flies
(They fly into the thick fuzz and get stuck
Without even the company of a good book).
It cannot be real, it’s far too shiny clean,
So well trimmed and shampooed, so pristine.
It looks as though it barely touches your face
Just hovers above the skin in the right place.
It stops bullets dead and deflects radiation,
Remains utterly impervious to penetration.
Your beard is thick but never grows long
Hides your alien nose, chin, lips and tongue.